Unauthorized Vacation: Are you kidding me?

Transfer time came and the CERT team arrived ready to take Spratt physically.  They had their adrenaline pumped up in the conference room as they were told that they might have a combative inmate who did not want to go face a murder charge.  They were surprised and disappointed when Spratt greeted them with a ‘Good Morning’ and voluntarily turned around to be handcuffed.  Spratt was taken to a room to be dressed in regular prison attire consisting of a blue button down shirt, blue jeans, and work boots.  He was given his inventoried property in a box (how ironic that the bitch officer had to pack his things up instead of him!) and escorted to the main gate for transfer to the airport.

Four regular correctional officers escorted him to the Boise airport but, upon arrival, could not locate the Puerto Rican extradition agents.  Airport security was called but they knew nothing about the transfer and could not locate the agents either.  Finally, Spratt noticed two obviously latin men coming down the escalator with suits and tropical shirts on.  Gold necklaces and mustaches completed their stereotypical appearance and the confused look on their faces told him that these must be the guys.  He drew the Sergeants attention to them and the group of officers, with their prisoner, went to the latin pair to introduce themselves.

The pair looked baffled at the introductions and it became painfully obvious that they didn’t speak English very well.  Both produced a badge and apologized for their tardiness in broken English.  Spratt could smell alcohol and mouthwash on their breath as if they had had too many drinks the night before (probably the real reason for their being late!).  The Idaho Sergeant hardly understood what they were saying but relinquished custody after one of them produced a paper with Spratt’s name on it.  The Idaho cuffs were taken off and the Puerto Rican cuffs and waist chain was put on in their place.  The Idaho Sergeant decided that it was best to escort everybody to the gate and make sure there were no problems with boarding the plane.  He admonished the Puerto Rican cops to keep an eye on Spratt as he was considered to be an escape risk.  Sergeant Rivera mumbled under his breath in Spanish “Does this asshole think we have never done this before!?”  Spratt, being very fluent in Spanish, smiled at this never ending battle of superiority/inferiority between ‘Gringos’ and Puerto Ricans; ongoing since the invasion of Puerto Rico during the Spanish American war in 1898.  Spratt considered whether he could use this animosity to his advantage.

He asked the Puerto Rican agents if he could see the extradition documents.  They said that they would show them to him once they got in the air.  He asked if they knew why he was being extradited and they responded that he was needed as a witness in an ongoing investigation.  “But, Idaho said that you have a murder charge against me.”  “Not that I know of said the Sergeant.”  Relieved, but confused, Spratt began to ponder what was really going on as they boarded the plane.

At cruising altitude, Spratt asked again if he could see the document but was told that it was in a briefcase in the overhead compartment and he would be shown the document once they landed in Salt Lake City to change planes.  Conversation turned to general issues in the political environment of Puerto Rico and the cops were entertained by Spratt’s knowledge of the language and culture.  The stewardess came by and asked if anybody wanted refreshments.  Spratt ordered a coffee but was immediately told no by the Sergeant.  This did not endear Spratt to him.

Upon arrival at the Salt Lake City airport, Spratt again asked to see the document but was told there was not enough time as they were late for their connecting flight to Atlanta.  Spratt sensed some type of deceit and was becoming very frustrated with their refusal to present the document but maintained a calm head as they boarded the next plane.  Spratt asked why he couldn’t have coffee and was told that they did not want to take him to the bathroom until they reached Puerto Rico.  Spratt promised that the coffee would not engage his bladder and they finally relented.  Spratt was served three cups of very strong coffee by the stewardess.

Approaching Atlanta, Spratt informed the Sergeant that he needed to go to the bathroom and the Sergeant exploded.  ‘This is why I told you no coffee pendejo.  You cannot go to the bathroom…I won’t allow it. You wait until we get to Puerto Rico!”  “What!?!  There is a two hour layover in Atlanta, you can’t make me wait that long!” “You hold it motherfucker!”

After the plane landed (it is customary that a prisoner is the first one boarded and the last one to leave the plane), Spratt refused to get out of his seat until he was allowed to use the bathroom.  After some heated conversation, the stewardess appeared and asked why Spratt couldn’t be allowed to use the facilities.  Under her assumed authority, the Puerto Rican cops escorted Spratt to the back of the plane and allowed him to relieve himself with the door open so they could see what he was doing.  In Spratt’s mind, he had just won the first battle in the struggle for control over the situation.

Inside the airport, the Puerto Rican cops carried Spratt’s box of personal belongings on the top of one of their wheeled suitcases.  They began making cell phone calls to their family and associates as the three of them waited for the connecting flight.  Spratt asked about lunch and the Sergeant went to the Pizza Hut concession and bought Personal Pan Pizzas and Cokes for everybody.  Knowing that, out of the two, only the Sergeant had a nicotine addiction and that it was a rarity for an inmate to be allowed to smoke, Spratt made the Sergeant aware that the Atlanta airport had designated rooms where smoking was allowed and asked if they could go have a cigarette.  Predictably, the Sergeant asked where those rooms were located but also, to Spratt’s surprise, allowed Spratt to have a cigarette as well to give Hector time to go to the bathroom.  This was Spratt’s first cigarette in over two years!  He was on the proverbial Cloud 9!  Coffee, Pizza, Coca-Cola, and cigarettes all in the same day!!  He didn’t even care that everybody else in the smoking room was staring at him due to the handcuffs.

The Sergeant had a problem.  He couldn’t find his keys and thought that he might have left them in the rental car in Idaho.  He didn’t speak enough English to contact the rental company to ask and was in a quandary about what to do.  Spratt told him that the rental company would probably contact him if they found them but the Sergeant couldn’t be consoled.  The main issue for him was that the keys to the police car that he drove to the airport in San Juan were on that keychain and he wouldn’t be able to start the car when they arrived in San Juan.  He would have to call headquarters for a ride and would look like a fool.  He asked Spratt to call the rental company for him and gave him a cell phone to make the call.  Spratt agreed to make the call if the Sergeant would also allow him to call his wife and children as well.  Knowing that prisoners are never allowed to make phone calls while in transit, the Sergeant agreed and Spratt called his wife and children and then contacted the rental company.  Battle number two: Victory!

Spratt talked as long as he could so that he could keep smoking the Sergeant’s cigarettes but became more nervous as the time for departure grew near.  Once back at the gate area, Spratt once again asked to see the extradition documents.  Another flimsy excuse was given about why it wasn’t possible before Spratt gave the ultimatum of having them produce the document or Spratt causing a confrontational scene in the airport.  Spratt told the Puerto Rican cops about a warrant for his arrest that existed in the State of Georgia and that, if a scene evolved and security was called, it was very possible that Georgia would take custody of their prisoner and they would go home empty-handed.  Hector produced the requested document from his briefcase while the Sergeant began cussing under his breath about what he was going to do to Spratt upon landing in Puerto Rico.

Spratt looked the document over and immediately noticed two things: one was that he was only wanted as a witness and was not being charged with murder at the moment, and that the document was only signed by Puerto Rican officials and the spaces for the signatures of any U.S. officials were blank.  Spratt asked if this was the only document in their possession and was told that it was.  Spratt also noticed another document that stated he was to be transported to a prison called ‘Bayamon 1072’ which was a notoriously violent prison controlled by a gang of inmates that would kill anybody suspected of being a ‘snitch’.  This struck fear in Spratt’s soul and he told the Puerto Rican cops that they could not place him in that prison as a witness…he would be killed.  The Sergeant said, ”Orders are Orders; that is where you are going!”  Spratt asked to speak to the Director of the extradition division but was told that she was unavailable.  Spratt demanded to speak to someone and tried to get them to realize that he wouldn’t live through the night if they placed him in that prison but they told him that nobody was available for him to speak to and he could speak with the warden of the prison upon his arrival.  Spratt knew that they would not arrive at that prison until after dark and he wouldn’t be able to speak to the warden until the next day…if he was still alive.  Spratt’s escape plans just vanished.  He would not be able to escape from a Puerto Rican prison if he was not alive to do so; he had to come up with another plan.